Hi jesse it’s Millie from Belfast school, I really like the descriptive writing you have written it made me feel like I was really in the moment I could tell you put a lot of thought into it I really like the bit at the end you put in. I also like how you put it is a 90 mile beach instead just telling us it was a beach. Next time if you can add a few more images or make it more colourful. How long did it take you to make it and did you use a thesaurus?
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ReplyDeleteHi jesse it’s Millie from Belfast school, I really like the descriptive writing you have written it made me feel like I was really in the moment I could tell you put a lot of thought into it I really like the bit at the end you put in. I also like how you put it is a 90 mile beach instead just telling us it was a beach. Next time if you can add a few more images or make it more colourful. How long did it take you to make it and did you use a thesaurus?
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